Chapter 10 - The Counselor’s Room
Three days later, Derrick and Aisha sat on opposite ends of a couch inside the office of Dr. Simone Harris, a child and family therapist recommended through the school district.
Marcus waited outside.
Derrick had suggested he join.
Aisha had refused.
“He is not Jayden’s legal parent,” she had said.
The irony nearly made Derrick laugh.
Dr. Harris was a calm Black woman in her forties with soft locs and the unnerving ability to let silence do most of her work.
“I want to establish one rule,” she said.
“Jayden will not be used to determine which adult is right.”
Aisha folded her arms.
Derrick nodded.
“He can express feelings. He can express preferences. But the burden of resolving this belongs to you.”
“Agreed,” Derrick said.
Aisha nodded reluctantly.
Dr. Harris looked at her.
“Mrs. Turner, why did you request the school use Turner?”
Aisha repeated familiar language.
Household consistency.
Belonging.
Confusion.
Dr. Harris listened.
Then asked, “Did Jayden request it?”
“No.”
“Did he resist it?”
“Not initially.”
“That was not my question.”
Aisha looked irritated.
“He asked why he had a different last name from me and Marcus.”
“And you interpreted that as distress?”
“Yes.”
“Did you ask?”
Aisha stared.
Dr. Harris turned to Derrick.
“Why is Cole important to you?”
Derrick considered pretending it was not.
Instead he answered honestly.
“Because it is part of the connection between us.”
Aisha looked at him.
Derrick continued.
“My father was a Cole. My grandfather. Jayden knows those stories.”
Dr. Harris asked, “Would you feel rejected if Jayden someday chose another surname?”
Derrick swallowed.
“Yes.”
The admission hurt.
“But I would rather be hurt by his choice than comforted by a choice somebody forced him to make for me.”
Aisha looked away.
Dr. Harris nodded.
“That distinction matters.”
Jayden entered later.
Both parents moved to leave.
Dr. Harris asked them to stay for the first few minutes.
Jayden sat in a chair between them.
His feet did not reach the floor.
Dr. Harris smiled.
“Your parents tell me there has been a lot of grown-up confusion about names.”
Jayden nodded.
“How does that feel?”
He shrugged.
“Annoying.”
Derrick almost smiled.
“What makes it annoying?”
“Everybody keeps acting weird.”
“Who is everybody?”
Jayden glanced at both parents.
“You.”
Aisha flinched.
Dr. Harris said, “Fair.”
Jayden relaxed slightly.
“What name do you use at school?”
“Turner.”
“What name do you use at Dad’s?”
“Cole.”
“What name do you think is yours?”
Jayden went quiet.
Aisha leaned forward slightly.
Dr. Harris lifted a hand.
No prompting.
After nearly twenty seconds, Jayden answered.
“Cole.”
Derrick’s chest tightened.
Aisha’s face changed.
Dr. Harris asked, “Tell me more.”
“That’s what was on my stuff when I was little.”
“What stuff?”
“My baby book. My basketball jerseys. Dad’s mailbox.”
Aisha looked down.
“Do you dislike Turner?”
Jayden shook his head.
“No.”
“What does Turner mean to you?”
“Mom and Marcus.”
“What does Cole mean?”
Jayden looked at Derrick.
“My dad.”
Dr. Harris waited.
“And you.”
Jayden nodded.
“Do you feel like you have to choose between those?”
Jayden’s lips tightened.
“Sometimes.”
Aisha whispered, “Baby—”
Dr. Harris stopped her gently.
“What makes you feel that way?”
Jayden stared at his hands.
“Mom gets happy when teachers call me Turner.”
Aisha’s eyes filled.
“And Dad gets sad.”
Derrick’s stomach dropped.
He had tried to hide it.
Children always noticed more than adults believed.
Dr. Harris asked, “What would make you feel less stuck?”
Jayden thought.
“I want grown-ups to stop asking whose family I’m in.”
Aisha began crying silently.
Jayden continued.
“I’m in everybody’s family.”
Derrick looked away.
Dr. Harris gave him a moment.
Then Jayden said something none of them expected.
“And I don’t want Marcus to think I don’t love him if I’m Cole.”
Aisha covered her mouth.
Derrick closed his eyes.
There it was.
The emotional debt a ten-year-old had been carrying.
Dr. Harris looked at both parents.
“This is the problem.”
Neither spoke.
“Not Cole.”
“Not Turner.”
She pointed gently between them.
“The problem is that Jayden has learned names affect adult security.”
Aisha wiped her face.
“I never wanted that.”
“I believe you.”
Dr. Harris turned to Derrick.
“And he knows your pain too.”
Derrick nodded.
“I understand.”
“Then both of you have work.”
For the first time, Derrick felt challenged rather than vindicated.
Good.
He needed that.
At the end of the session, Dr. Harris asked Jayden whether he wanted to continue speaking privately.
He agreed.
Derrick and Aisha waited outside.
Marcus stood near the window.
Aisha walked toward him.
He opened his arms.
She stepped into them.
Derrick looked away.
Then the office door opened.
Dr. Harris called Aisha back alone.
Ten minutes later, Aisha emerged pale.
“What?” Marcus asked.
She ignored him and walked toward Derrick.
“Did you tell her about my father?”
“No.”
Aisha stared.
“Then how did she know?”
“I don’t know.”
Dr. Harris appeared behind her.
“I didn’t.”
Aisha turned.
Dr. Harris spoke softly.
“Jayden did.”
Aisha froze.
“He told me you once said you never wanted him carrying the name of a man who might leave.”
Derrick slowly looked at her.
Aisha’s face crumpled.
Jayden had heard more than either of them realized.
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And suddenly Aisha’s private wound was no longer private.
She had handed it to her son.
